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Yichud- Can An Unmarried Female Baby Sitter Be Alone Watching Young Boys

*** This Halacha deals with topic of Yichud. Yichud is the concept that a man may not be secluded with a forbidden woman. Please read all the Halachot on this topic as there are conditions and exclusions that must be fully understood before accepting Lema’ase. ***

There is a common question in the laws of Yichud that needs to be addressed. The question is about baby sitters. It is quite common for a couple to leave for the evening and hire a baby sitter to watch their kids. So the question is asked if whether or not a female baby sitter can be alone with a young boy. The girl would be any where from 13 – 18 years of age in this type of arrangement. So would she be allowed to baby sit for a boy?

The work "Minchat Ish" (starting on p. 263) addresses thiscase of a girl babysitting for a boy aged nine or above.

Once the boy reaches the age of 9, there would be a problem of Yichud. It would not be permissible for a teenage girl to watch over him. She can not be there with him even if there are other children in the house. Additionally, they do not have any of the leniencies that we discussed in other Halachot such as Ishto Ba’Ir or Ba’Ala Ba’Ir, as those can not apply here.

However, there are some methods that alleviate the problem of Yichud in this case. One way according to the Acharonim, is to give the keys to some neighbors. The keys are given out, and the neighbors are told to occasionally check the house. The neighbors must actually go to the house from time to time. It’s not enough to just give them the keys knowing they would not ever check. The babysitter must also be informed that the neighbor will be periodically entering, and there must be no possibility of locking the door from the interior. If all these conditions are met, then the babysitter may stay alone with the boy, since they know that at any moment the neighbor might come in. The neighbor must also have all means of access which include alarm codes, dead-bolt keys, etc. They need to be able to enter the house.

The same method can be used to allow a housekeeper to remain in the house with a young boy when the parents are out. Others must have a key, and they must actually use it from time to time. Their potential arrival at any time serves as protection and deterrent to prevent any wrong doings in the house.

So when planning to be out, make sure to avoid problems of Yichud and hand over a set of house keys to some neighbors, or friends, or even relatives. A female baby sitter is not allowed to watch over a boy who is from the age of nine and up, as it could lead to problems. But, so long as you give keys to others, and they actually check in from to time, such would then alleviate the Yichud problem and the female sitter would be allowed to be in the house.


 


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