*** This Halacha deals with topic of Yichud. Yichud is the concept that a man may not be secluded with a forbidden woman. Please read all the Halachot on this topic as there are conditions and exclusions that must be fully understood before accepting Lema’ase. ***
Ba’Ala Ba’Ir is a leniency in the laws of Yichud allowing a woman to be secluded with another man so long as her husband is nearby in town. So the question we ask today is if the reverse holds true as well or not? Meaning, can a married man be secluded with a lady and rely on a leniency called ‘Ishto Ba’Air’? (Ba’Ala Ba’Ir translated into English means- ‘her husband is in town’, and ‘Ishto Ba’Ir’ translated into English means- ‘his wife is in town.’) So can we say the same by men as we say by women?
There is a Machloket on this issue. Maran in Shulchan Aruch writes the words ‘Ishto Imo’ when referring to the protection of one’s husband in the matter of Yichud. This means that the only time a wife protects her husband is when she is with him. Maran says that a man can protect his wife by simply being nearby in town. That is what ‘Ba’Ala Ba’Ir signifies. But a woman can only protect her husband by being there with him. That is what ‘Ishto Imo’ signifies. So Maran’s opinion is that a woman can not protect her husband by simply being in the same town. The Shulchan Aruch says ‘Ishto Imo’ by a man, and not ‘Ishto Ba’Ir.’
Maran is one of many Chachamim who hold as above, but on the other side there are many Chachamim who are lenient, who recognize a leniency of ‘Ishto Ba’Ir.’ Among those who are lenient is a Rabbi called the Beit Shemuel (Rabbi Shmuel ben Uri Shraga Faibesh), a Rabbi by the name of Rav Yehoshua Latz who wrote the Perisha, and the Aruch HaShulchan (Rav Yechiel Michel Epstein 1829-1888).
The Tzitz Eleizer (Rav Eliezer Waldenberg) discusses an interesting question. Can a man of the house be secluded in the home with the housekeeper? It’s quite possible where his wife is not at home, and he finds himself alone with the maid. Now according to what we said above, there is no leniency of ‘Ishto Ba’Ir’, meaning the man can not rely on the fact that his wife is somewhere nearby in town. So the Tzitz Eliezer says that if his wife just ran out to do some errands and her return is imminent, so the husband under such a condition may be alone in the house with the housekeeper. The logic being that his wife is expected back at any moment, and such would prevent him from engaging in improprieties for fear that his wife may at any second come into the house. But on the other hand, the Tzitz Eliezer is not lenient and does not recognize such a leniency if the wife is busy at work, or busy somewhere, whereby it’s clear that she is not about to return home. But he says, if the wife has a key to the house and it is possible for her to enter without expectation, then in such a case we can be lenient and recognize Ishto Ba’Air. For that matter, the husband may be alone in the house with the maid if a friend or neighbor has a key and they from time to time use the key unexpectedly. The possibility of their visit would serve as a fearful deterrent against falling prey to temptation and sin. Another way to get around this problem, he says, is to leave the door unlocked.
So to answer this Halacha question, we will say to be Machmir (strict) and to follow only the rule of ‘Ishto Imo’. A woman can not protect a man by simply being in town like a man protects a lady under the leniency of ‘Ba’Ala Ba’I’. A woman must be there with him in order to protect him. However there are some exceptions to this. If the husband leaves the door unlocked then it’s OK. If the wife has a key and it’s feared that she will come unexpectedly, then it’s OK. If someone else has a key and enters from time to time unexpectedly, then it’s OK. And lastly, if the wife is expected back momentarily, then it’s OK.
