DailyHalacha.com for Mobile Devices Now Available

Click Here to Sponsor Daily Halacha
"Delivered to Over 6000 Registered Recipients Each Day"

      
(File size: 4.47 MB)
The Prohibition Against Contradicting One’s Parent

The Shulhan Aruch, in discussing the laws of respecting parents (Yoreh De’a 240:2), mentions that it is forbidden to contradict one’s parent’s statement in the parent’s presence. If one’s parent expresses an opinion, it is forbidden to tell the parent that the opinion is wrong. In fact, one may not even support his parent’s viewpoint by saying, "I think he’s right," because it is disrespectful to indicate that the parent needs the child’s backing. Certainly, the child may not explicitly state that he thinks the other view is correct.

As for situations where the parent is not present, the Poskim instruct that one may express disagreement, but in an indirect or otherwise respectful manner. One example given is an instance where the Tur (Rabbenu Yaakov Ba’al Ha’turim, 1269-1343) disputes a Halachic ruling of his father, the Rosh (Rabbenu Asher Ben Yehiel, 1250-1327). But instead of explicitly stating that he did not accept his father’s position, the Tur instead cited the ruling of the Ba’al Ha’terumot (Rav Baruch Ben Yishak of Worms, 1140-1211) – which was the same ruling as the Rosh – and then disputed his ruling. This way, the Tur disputed his father indirectly, rather than explicitly saying that he disagreed with his father’s position. Likewise, in any circumstance where one disagrees with his father, he may express his disagreement when his father is not present, as long as he does so with the utmost respect and reverence.

The Pit’hei Teshuba, citing the Asmot Yosef (commentary to Masechet Kiddushin by Rabbi Yosef Ibn Ezra, Bulgaria, 1506-1589), notes that this Halacha does not apply to raising questions and posing challenges over the course of study. If a father and son are learning together, it is certainly permissible for the son to question what his father said as normally happens when two study partners learn together. This is part of the normal process of learning, and thus does not constitute an infringement upon the father’s honor.

Summary: One may not dispute his parent’s statement in his presence, and even when his parent is not present, disagreeing with something the parent said is allowed only if it is done respectfully. When a father and son learn together, however, it is permissible for the child to question and challenge what his father says as part of the usual learning process.

 


Recent Daily Halachot...
Shabbat – Ensuring That the Countertop is Dry Before Putting Down a Hot Pot
Reheating Solid Food With Some Liquid on Shabbat
Is it Permissible to Eat Soup That Was Reheated on Shabbat?
Placing Cold Liquid Near the Stove on Shabbat
Placing a Raw Food Next to a Hot Food on a Plate on Shabbat
Can A Man or Woman Eat or Drink Prior To Kiddush On Shabbat Morning
Asking a Gentile to Write on One’s Behalf on Shabbat
Is It Permissible To Take Vitamins On Shabbat
Tying Knots on Shabbat-Basic Understandings of Restrictions and Permissions
Is It Permissible To Trap Pets in the House on Shabbat?
Is It Permissible To Eat A Meal Just Prior To Shabbat
Is It Permissible to Lace Shoes on Shabbat?
Is It Permissible to Set Up a Mousetrap on Shabbat?
May One Move a Garment on Shabbat if There is Money in the Pocket?
Is It Permissible To Cover A Pot with its Cover or Tin Foil or Other on Shabbat
Page of 239
3585 Halachot found