Is it permissible for a person observing Abelut (mourning) for a deceased relative, Heaven forbid, to wear freshly-laundered clothing?
This issue is subject to divergent traditions between Sepharadim and Ashkenazim. Sepharadim, following the ruling of Maran (Shulhan Aruch Yoreh De’a 389:8), allow wearing freshly-laundered or freshly-pressed clothing immediately following the seven-day Shiba observance. Ashkenazim, by contrast, forbid wearing freshly-laundered clothing until after the conclusion of the thirty-day Sheloshim period.
When it comes to new clothing, however, even Sepharadim forbid wearing such clothes during the period of Sheloshim. New clothes may be worn only after the thirtieth day of Abelut, and after somebody tells the mourner that he should wear new clothing. (In Halachic jargon this is called "Ge’ara," which literally means "rebuke," whereby somebody "criticizes" the mourner for his appearance and urges him to purchase new clothing.) According to some authorities, new garments may not be worn even after the conclusion of Sheloshim, and even after a mourner is urged to wear new clothing, until the first Yom Tob that is observed after the Sheloshim. The Halachic authorities rule that one should follow this stringent opinion, and thus three conditions must be met for a mourner to be allowed to wear new clothing:
1) Thirty days must have passed;
2) Somebody urges the mourner to wear new clothing;
3) At least one Yom Tob has occurred since the conclusion of Sheloshim.
If a mourner must wear a new garment before the end of the Sheloshim period, he may give the garment to somebody else to wear for two or three days, after which it is no longer considered "new" and he may then wear it.
It is permissible for a mourner to move into a new home after the seven-day Shiba period, even if he mourns the passing of a parent. A mourner may recite the Beracha of "She’hehiyanu" even during the Shiba period, such as if he was brought a new fruit, or even if his son is undergoing Berit Mila or Pidyon Ha’ben; in all such circumstances, he may recite "She’hehiyanu."
Summary: According to Sephardic custom, a mourner may wear freshly-laundered garments immediately after the seven-day Shiba period. New clothes, however, may not be worn until the first Yom Tob following the thirty-day Sheloshim period, and only if somebody urged him to wear new clothing.
