In many places it is customary for people to kiss the top of a Rabbi's hand when coming before him for a blessing. The question arises as to whether this is permissible when a woman receives a blessing from a Rabbi. Is she permitted to kiss his hand, or does this transgress the Halachic prohibition against physical contact between a man and woman who is not his wife?
The Ben Ish Hai (Rabbi Yosef Haim of Baghdad, 1833-1909) addresses this question in his work Od Yosef Hai (Parashat Shoftim, 22; listen to audio for precise citation), and rules that a woman may, in fact, kiss the Rabbi's hand in such a case. He explains that this gesture does not fall under the category of "Derech Hiba" – an affectionate gesture – since kisses for affection are usually given upon the face or forehead, and not the hand. Furthermore, women who kiss the Rabbi's hand do so purely out of respect for the Torah, just as one would kiss a Torah scroll, and it therefore does not constitute an inappropriate gesture. The Ben Ish Hai cites numerous sources on which he bases his ruling, including a position cited by the Rama (Rabbi Moshe Isserles, Poland, 1525-1572), in his glosses to the Shulhan Aruch (Even Ha'ezer 21:5), that "so long as one does not act in an affectionate manner, and his intent is solely for the sake of Heaven," no prohibition is entailed.
Hacham Ovadia Yosef, in his work Taharat Ha'bayit, records that some Rabbis had the practice of wrapping their hand in some kind of material when a woman would come forth for a blessing, so that she would not be directly kissing his hand. According to the strict Halacha, however, this is not necessary, for the reasons mentioned above.
Unfortunately, many people who observe distinguished Rabbis allowing women to kiss their hand as they approach for a blessing make disrespectful accusations against the Rabbi. This ruling of the Ben Ish Hai should suffice to justify the practice observed by many Rabbis to allow women to kiss their hands as a sign of reverence for the Rabbi and the Torah he represents.
It hopefully goes without saying that the so-called "social kiss" is strictly forbidden according to Halacha. Kissing a member of the opposite gender on the check clearly constitutes "Derech Hiba" – an affectionate gesture – and has no Halachic justification whatsoever.
Summary: It is permissible for a woman who comes to a Rabbi for a blessing to kiss the top of his hand as an expression of reverence, as is the custom among many communities.
