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Visiting the Sick and Comforting the Mourner: Which Takes Precedence?

If a person has before him the opportunity to perform either the Mitzva of Bikur Cholim (visiting the sick) or that of Nichum Avel (comforting a mourner), which of these two Mitzvot takes precedence?

 

The Rambam discusses this question in Hilchot Avel (13:7), and he writes (listen to audio for precise citation) that in such a case the Mitzva of comforting a mourner takes precedence.  He explains that one who comforts a mourner performs an act of kindness towards both the mourner as well as the deceased, and therefore this Mitzva takes precedence over visiting the sick, which is beneficial only to the patient.

 

The Radbaz (Egypt, 1480-1574) commented that had the Rambam not issued this ruling, he would have concluded that to the contrary, visiting the sick takes precedence.  The Sages teach that one who visits a sick patient "restores his life," either by offering assistance and encouragement, by praying on his behalf, or simply by virtue of his presence.  Hence, neglecting to visit the sick is – in many cases – tantamount to killing a person.  The same cannot be said about comforting a mourner, and therefore, the Radbaz remarked, intuitively he would have concluded that the Mitzva to visit an ill patient should override the Mitzva of comforting a person in mourning.

 

The Radbaz's comments should reinforce in our minds the importance of visiting those who are ill.  Many patients in hospitals and nursing homes need visitors and people to help them and raise their spirits, and anyone with an opportunity to make these visits must do so.  These patients are "drowning," and we bear the obligation to rescue them through frequent visits.  The Chafetz Chayim (Rabbi Yisrael Meir Kagan of Radin, Lithuania, 1835-1933) remarked that whenever a person attends a funeral, he must give serious thought to whether or not he was in any way responsible for the person's death.  Some have suggested that the widespread custom to wash one's after a funeral stems from this notion.  During the "Egla Arufa" ceremony conducted when a murder victim is discovered, the city's leaders wash their hands and declare that their "hands are clean" of any guilt with regard to the victim.  We, too, must be able to leave a funeral with the ability to proclaim that we bear no guilt in the death of the deceased.  It therefore behooves us to approach the Mitzva of Bikur Cholim very seriously, and commit ourselves to offering assistance and encouragement to ill patients, so that we do what we can to save and improve their lives.

 

Summary: A person faced with the Mitzva of visiting the ill and comforting the mourner should comfort the mourner; however, this Halacha in no way undermines the importance of Bikur Cholim, as visiting the sick in many instances has the capacity to restore the patient's life and even save him from death.

 


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