This coming Motzae Shabbat, Sept. 2nd/ 9 Elul, at 9:30 PM, we will be concluding Masechet Yoma with a Siyum and celebration at the Lawrence Ave Synagogue in Deal, NJ. Several Daf Yomi programs will come together on this special night for a light dairy dinner, followed by speeches, and celebratory music with David Shiro. Join program leaders; Rabbi Eli Mansour, Rabbi Choueka, Rabbi Semah, Rabbi Joey Tawil, Rabbi Rahamim Aboud, Isaac Yedid, Bert Hidary, with their respective Daf Yomi learners on this special occasion. We invite the community to attend, be inspired, and take part in this Daf Yomi cycle’s conclusion of Masechet Yoma.
Today's Halacha...
A person visiting an ill patient, in fulfillment of the Mitzva of Bikur Cholim, must be aware of the proper protocols to follow during the visit.
Firstly, a visitor must remember that he is a visitor, and not a doctor. All too often, visitors encumber the patient by asking all sorts of questions concerning his condition and initiating unsolicited medical advice. The patient must already respond to the physician's thorough inquiries, and he may likely experience additional aggravation by having to answer a visitor's questions.
Some Rabbis extracted this lesson from God's visit to Avraham on the third day after his circumcision. As we read in the Book of Bereishit, God's visit was followed by the visit of three angels, one of whom being Refael, who, as the Sages tell us, cured Avraham of his pain. The obvious question arises, why didn't God Himself bring Avraham his cure? Some have suggested that God did not cure Avraham's illness because He came as a visitor, not as a physician. A visitor should follow this example, and allow the doctors to do their job of administering medical treatment, while focusing his attention on his job of offering the patient much-needed emotional support and encouragement.
A visitor must also exercise care with regard to his facial expression when entering the room to visit the patient. Visitors often find themselves surprised or dismayed upon seeing the patient's condition, a reaction that in many instances will translate into a look of shock on the visitor's face. This can cause the patient grief and despair, and a visitor must therefore ensure to control his facial expressions so as to offer encouragement, rather than further despair.
Finally, some Rabbis have noted that the word "Bikur" means not only "visit," but also "inspection." For example, the process of examining an animal's organs after Shechita (slaughtering) is referred to in Halacha as "Bikur." The Mitzva of "Bikur Cholim," then, requires not merely visiting the sick patient, but also "inspecting" his condition, seeing what his needs are and how the visitor can help. Often a sick patient may need somebody to straighten up the room, bring him a bottle of water, water the plants, and so on. Many ill patients are hesitant or embarrassed to ask favors, so it behooves the visitor to "inspect" the situation, to see how he could be of assistance and offer to help.
Incidentally, one Rabbi once commented that whenever a person is asked to perform a favor, he should respond, "It would be my pleasure" rather than "It's no problem." The response, "It's no problem" suggests that this favor indeed poses a "problem," but he is willing to endure it on the requester's behalf. It is far better to respond, "It would be my pleasure," which indicates that the given favor is truly no trouble whatsoever, and, to the contrary, gives the person much pleasure and gratification.
Summary: When one visits an ill patient, he should not ask too many questions about his condition or offer unsolicited medical advice; he should focus instead on offering encouragement and emotional support. Upon entering the room, a visitor must ensure not to look surprised at the sorrowful condition of the patient. Finally, the Mitzva of visiting the sick includes not only paying a visit, but also assessing the situation to determine the needs of the patient and how he can perhaps offer assistance.
